.comment-link {margin-left:.6em;}

Fermius Firefly

A Dream Log, whenever I remember the dreams I've had.

My Photo
Location: San Marcos, United States

Fermius is a pen name drawn from a series of short fiction I wrote when I published the small press magazine Stellanova (on paper.) I play RPG games to escape from my daily grind as a technology wage slave for the state of California. I eat out a lot in order to do my part in supporting our increasingly service level economy. I am butler to 2 feline masters. If you ask them they will tell you I'm not very good at it, late with dinner, don't have enough hands with brushes in them, and sometimes I even lock them out of their office.

Friday, July 18, 2008

First Believer in Gets the Job.

       When I was younger I almost bought a step van to use for a movie. It wasn't quite the right price, so the movie never got made. I dreamed that I was driving a highly modded version of that step van. N and I were going to some sort of concert, and the parking people didn't want to give us a parking space. It looked like they were going to turn us away until I spotted them parking a Humvee. The Step Van wasn't any wider or longer than that, I pointed out, just taller. They relented and found us a place to park between a couple of card tables.
       There were card tables set up, two in every other parking space. The tables were being used for some sort of registration/T-shirt give-away. We met several friends there and went to the concert (which I have absolutely no recollection of.)
       After the concert I was driving us to a friend's wedding celebration. Alien spacecraft swooped in and strafed the streets leading to the wedding. I decided we needed to do something about it. The Devil was suddenly sitting in the chair behind me, asking who I thought I was, “God or something?”
       “Yes,” I answered and reached out to shut down the weapons system of the attacking spacecraft and then forced them to fly away where the fleet would be forced to recover them.
       We arrived and the Devil and I had a towel snapping fight in the public showers in the Y where the wedding was to be held. The Devil tried cheating by using his tail as well as the towels. I grabbed it the second time it snaked out at me and then pulled the Devil around by the tail with my left hand while using my right hand to repeatedly snap his backside unhindered. The gathered audience declared me the winner unanimously.
       The Devil demanded a rematch. I sighed not wanting to take a chance of losing. We jumped back in time to the point where we were approaching the wedding. I spotted the alien fighter bombers long before they unleashed their lethal attack, disarming them and causing them to all crash into a distant abandoned building. I prevented the life-pods from lifting off, holding them about three stories above the ground. Police arrived to take the alien pilots into custody. I'm sure the FBI were on their way as well. I suggested, telepathically, that we hold the pilots gently so as to not spoil the soon to be started release talks. I realized that the Devil wasn't really a devil, but one of the aliens.
       “This still doesn't explain your prodigious mental powers,” the alien griped.
       “I'm God, didn't I already tell you that?”
       “No, you're not.” Nan huffed and sat in the passenger seat, just behind the entry steps. The seat rolled forward over the stairs on rails to put her just behind the wind screen and next to me. She turned to our uninvited guest. “Who's that?” She pointed to the Alien.
       “He said he was the Devil, that's why I said I was God. Really, I don't know, he just appeared here, but I'm pretty sure he's an alien like the pilots of those attacking fighters.
       “What fighters?”
       “Those, oh, just look over there,” I turned down a side street with a view of the crashed spacecraft.
       “Where are you going. We're going to be late for the wedding!” She looked out where I was pointing, spotting the crashed tails of the alien ships thrust from the smoking building. We stopped at a traffic signal, I lowered the escape pods and popped their doors for the police. I smiled at the surprise they had in store for them. I'm pretty sure they weren't expecting red-skinned horned and barbed tailed aliens from another world.
       “Darned that Prometheus, who knew you'd come so far in so short a time.” The alien slumped in the back passenger seat, munching on my bag of Frito's Corn Chips. “These are good.”
       I turned left to get us back on course for the Y and the upcoming wedding.
       “Eww,” N's disagreement was plain.
       “Time for a re-match.”
       “No time, we're going to be late. How are we going to get him in without an invite.”
       “It's a Y, I don't think anyone can keep him out.”
       “Even if he is a devil? YMCA here, the 'C' stands for 'Christian,' remember?”
       “Yes, and the 'M' stands for 'Mens.' So what's your point?”
       “And the 'Y' stands for 'Young', which none of us are, relatively speaking.”
       N glared at the alien, with a look that said he might well be a devil if not the Devil. “Why don't you go back where you came from?” N's question was really more of a suggestion.
       “God here fixed it so I can't.”
       “Don't want them hopping all over the place causing trouble.”
       “But you don't even believe in God”
       “I didn't until the Devil showed up in our van. Then what was I to think?”
       “Yep, first believer gets the job.”
       N's confusion rippled across her face, chased by annoyance. “It doesn't work that way.”
       “Apparently it does,” the alien and I said in unison.

Labels: , , , ,


Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home