Brat Discipline, My Way

I dreamed this morning that I was visiting someone I hadn't seen in several years, and was surprised to find that they had a two year old brat. The brat was really being a brat.
When mom and dad left the room I leaned over to the brat, took away my lego dune buggy and handed him some more age appropriate lego toys. He started to screw up his face to wail and cry about it.
I leaned in "I ate the last child they had because he was a whining ninny who didn't mind, don't you imagine I'd be just as happy to do the same to you."
"What!"
"You don't see an older brother around here do you? And where do you think all those clothes came from that are too big for you?"
He started to wrench up his face again.
"Yum." I said staring at him.
He stopped. Took the larger legos and sat down to play with them. "Much better, you just might make it to three."
Mom and Dad came back in. "I might not have to eat this one," I said. The kid turned white, looking at Mom and Dad.
Dad was confused, but Mom jumped right in. "Whew! that's a relief."
"Just let me know if he gets out of line," I said.

I only wish it could be that easy. I didn't like having to lie to the brat, but it sure was fun.