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Fermius Firefly

A Dream Log, whenever I remember the dreams I've had.

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Location: San Marcos, United States

Fermius is a pen name drawn from a series of short fiction I wrote when I published the small press magazine Stellanova (on paper.) I play RPG games to escape from my daily grind as a technology wage slave for the state of California. I eat out a lot in order to do my part in supporting our increasingly service level economy. I am butler to 2 feline masters. If you ask them they will tell you I'm not very good at it, late with dinner, don't have enough hands with brushes in them, and sometimes I even lock them out of their office.

Monday, August 26, 2013

Yeah, Not Getting That.

I had a brace of little dreams, each more frustrating than the last, where I did not get what I wanted. One involved N, and the part of me that was slightly awake kept asking "what the hell are you doing?" All the while I was trying to convince her that I was taking care of my mental health issues now, so it would be better. (Which is a complete fabrication, if anything I am worse than I was, not better. At least I understand there is a problem, now.)

In another dream I can't catch the rats in my attic. They evade the traps and no longer run out of the rafters, so I can't even seal the place up again. I am going to have to bring in a professional. (This dream is certainly turning prophetic. As I type this I can hear them above my head, skittering about.) Whatever is in the attic this time has dug in deep and gone into parts of the attic that I cannot reach. I can tell that I'm going to have to strip out most of the insulation just to find the little monsters. In the dream, I keep snagging myself against the roofing nails in the outermost layer, and by the time the dream is done, I am soaked in my own blood and barely able to see or breath.

In another dream I am watching a smallish woman trying desperately to keep her job all while being told that she simply isn't big enough to drive the new forklift (and she isn't, she looks like a seven year old behind the wheel.) The frustration is that she's certain the company deliberately purchased the largest forklifts they could find, just to get rid of her. I am looking at the piles of parts and bins on pallets and can't help but think that the forklift she drives really isn't big enough for the jobs in this warehouse. I tried to find out if there was another warehouse, closer to their terminal distribution centers, where the loads would, by necessity, be smaller. There were. She would have nothing to do with them, as they were too far from her home. I could see the frustration on both sides of this one, but knew how it must end, as the company had pretty much all the power.

After I woke from this one, I wondered why I hadn't offered up the idea of a booster seat and blocks on the pedals.

In the last dream I was dealing with deferred maintenance. The hot tub smelled like a marshy jungle, and everyone seemed to want me to clean it up and repair it so they could come over and use it. No one wanted to help with that chore, though. I didn't so much mind the cleaning, but the repairs were going to be as much as a new tub, and the operation costs, ugh. I still couldn't afford the thousand dollars a year it cost to operate, I'd be running in the red again. People were even trying to argue that it would be worth it just because it would "improve your love life."

Yeah. Not getting that.

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